A Bit Discouraged

Okay, a lot discouraged.  College was a waste of time.  (Uh, thanks, IWU, for exactly zero help in getting an internship or a job.)  If you're not a nurse or an engineer, you're screwed, pure and simple.  I'd rather have gone to trade school at this rate.  I'm entering week 4 of being unemployed, and it just plain sucks.  I've sent resume after resume to anything I could even remotely do, and I have yet to receive one phone call.  Now I kind of know what my sister feels like.  

My resume is one page and is pretty succinct.  I have plenty of experience in the construction field and I'd say my experience in general is pretty advanced so I feel like I'm above an administrative assistant job at this point.  I don't really want to take a pay cut because even though I was fired, my last employer paid me the same rate for about 2 or 3 years so it's not unheard of.  In fact, if I got the same job today, I'm sure I'd be paid more because I was still being severely underpaid.  I'm sure that's why I was let go though...probably paying me more than the other lady was making since she hired in as a receptionist and probably is being paid as such.  I hope I never see her face again, honestly.  

This post is not a sunshine and flowers post.  I'm normally pretty positive and optimistic, but at this point, I want to shoot someone.  I had a small breakdown this morning, and it sucks.  I'm thankful that I'm not responsible for my own apartment any more, or I would be in an even worse place mentally.  

My self-esteem is suffering at this point, and I hate my former employer for it, personally.  I used to be greatly appreciated and quite frankly a "super star" there.  I know I can do a lot of great things, but I got driven into the ground there, and they let me go for what was a bullshit reason.  It's not that I wasn't doing my job or slacking off or anything.  Not taking initiative?  Are you effing kidding me??  From what I hear, they're also trying to get some of my coworkers to quit.  Plus, one of them got written up because of something that really should have been my fault since I made the decision.  That just pisses me right off.  I'm trying as hard as I can while I look for a job to pass along anything I see for my friends.  Several of them need out of there.  All of us "peons" are the smart ones in the company, and the management can't see that so they treat everyone like crap. 

I heard before I left that one of our friends who was fired at the end of October finally got a good, better-paying job, but holy crap, that was a whole 4 months without a job!!  He was screwed over too.  Never asked for anything, came in, did his job for 18 or more years.  He never went above and beyond, but he knew how to do his job well.  Why is that so wrong??  Why is it a crime to not be a butt-kisser that makes everyone sick??  I KNOW that's why I was let go.  I refused to cow tow those people and so the lady that did got my job.  It's so gross. 

I was searching for jobs before I wrote this post, but it's been on my mind for, like, forever so I figured I should get this out before I explode.  At least it's spring, and it's a gorgeous day outside.  I have a husband with an excellent job, and we're even going to be able to take a good vacation this spring so I really shouldn't complain.  I can though so I will.  

I know I'll find a job, but when I do, I just want it to be the right one that I can actually enjoy doing for people who appreciate it.  I'm even considering a career change.  Maybe I do need to go to trade school or get a 2 year degree in something other than "business" (Man, what a cop-out. What did I know about what I wanted to do with my life at 18 or even 22?).  I think at this point I'll start looking for volunteer opportunities so that I can have something to get up for in the mornings and something I can tell employers I was actually "doing" while looking for work.  I'm thinking the Hamilton County animal shelter or humane society.  I really love animals, and if I can't bring myself to be a vet (blood=ew), then I at least want to help in some way.  

Anyway, I highly doubt anyone's actually reading this now since I haven't posted in ages, and no one bothers to comment, but thanks for reading all the same!